@o__0Dev: On average, a person has sex 86 times a year. Apparently, this is going to be one hell of a week.
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@nimble__nick: *At the pearly gates* St Peter: Welcome to heaven. I'll show you around. Me: Sooo many oysters must've died to make this gate.
@AKcrazy18: I got sent out of class today at school. The teacher yelled at me, "What would your parents say if I called them?' I replied, "Hello?"