@TheTobbie: On Facebook, someone posted that they have 90 days of pregnancy left. The 1st commenter said 'when are you due?' This is why we are here...
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@rdthought: Girlfriend: Stop lying around on the couch all day. Me: But you said we needed to start conserving energy.
@WheelTod: [Date] Her: Any hobbies? Me: Monging mostly. Her: Huh? Me: I'm a monger Her: Huh? Me: Iron, fish, war... You name it -- I'll monger it
@bacon_gillepic: A client on the phone accidentally said they love me before they hung up Not gonna lie it felt good
@BiIIMurray: I think abs are for guys that don’t have the confidence to wear a nice T-shirt to the pool.