@WhatTheFFacts: On June 28, 2009 Stephen Hawking threw a party for time-travelers. He announced the party the day after it happened and he said no one came.
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@bornmiserable: Guys who say there's a party in their pants are probably referring to search parties.
@JediGigi: [on 1st date] Him: So why is someone as pretty as you single? Me: Single? Who's single? [gets right up in his face] We marry at dawn.