@MavenofHonor: On some level I've always known that caterpillars drink dewdrops. But I never sat down to think about it while crossing the street before.
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@TedInModeration: Rips off my shirt to reveal an S on my chest that's actually remnants of last nights spaghettiO's
@RandomRamblr: She believed me when i said concentration camps were for people with Attention Deficit Disorder.
@Mindless4Miles: [orders pizza] Would you also like our cheesy bread, comes with sauce? Are you trying to sell me a side of pizza with my pizza? 2 please.
@WheelTod: [First Date. Full moon] Her: You looked different in your profile picture. Werewolf: I forgot to check the calendar