@WheelTod: On your first day at the beach, go up to the toughest-looking guy there, and let the air out of his water-wings.
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@nettie0918: I lifted my hands up in the air and waved them like I just didn't care..... Ceiling fan: 6 Me: 0
@trumpetcake: Spent the day dressed as a bee, gently bumping myself against my neighbor's sliding-glass door. Got the hose twice.
@tastefactory: "It's gonna taste really good." - excerpt from the guide What To Expect When You're Expecting Pizza