@duplicitron: Once a guy at the grocery store yelled at me to stop talking on a banana like a phone so I hung up and shot him with it.
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@Reverend_Scott: Fun Fact: The "eye roll" was created by Eve in the Garden of Eden within 15 min of her first conversation with Adam.
@Reverend_Scott: [Shop class] Satan: Whatcha makin'? God: Trust. Man can use it to form lasting bonds and friendships. What you making? Satan: A bong.
@k_lli: My calendar says I have 18 meetings left this week. Time to go lick Maria in accounting; she's coming down with flu.
@GreenEyedJedi: I once dated a guy who left a trail of rose petals leading to a sinkful of dirty dishes.