@OneFunnyMummy: Once upon a time I could complete a sentence and then I had kids. The end.
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@WorkaholicBlake: There are 364 days until Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up. Unbelievable
@JohnLyonTweets: Hey Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me. *Tambourine Man shakes tambourine for several minutes* Well that sucked.
@ashmensch: Harry: Want to see a magic trick? Voldemort: Let's see what you got Potter. Harry: Got your nose! Voldemort: You know I hate that game.