@badbanana: Once you commit to the idea of a closed casket funeral it really takes a lot of pressure off how you live your life.
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@Jesssicle: If I drop something in the toilet, it's gone forever. I am not going in after it. Just ask my daughter. Oh, that's right, you can't.
@MatCro: [4 strangers are smearing their bodily fluids on each other] [one turns to camera] "There has to be a better way." VOICEOVER: "Hot tubs."
@jonnysun: look. life is bad. evryones sad. we're all gona die. but i alredy bought this inflatable boumcy castle so r u gona take ur shoes off or wat
@daemonic3: Caveman1: look, I invent wheel Caveman2: what we do now? Caveman1: wait for Jesus to take wheel Caveman2: dum dum Jesus not invented yet