@Tw1tter_K1tten: One day the mailman is going to murder my whole family and my dog will be like "Ha. Who needs to quit yapping and go lay down now?"
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@roostermustache: Me: yah after the car accident i can barely raise my arm Lawyer: how high could u raise it before Me:*raises arm over head* like this high
@BoogTweets: Me: You are not going to believe this… Priest: Your confessions will always be belived, my child Me: There is no toilet paper over here.