@simoncholland: One fun thing about kids crying is trying to determine if they broke a crayon or got their arm stuck in a piece of farming equipment.
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@SkunkFarts: The American flag should be a picture of a cheeseburger watching TV on a couch made of fries.
@SondraDeeMe: My boyfriend doesn't like when I give our neighbors nicknames like, "Beard Man" "Jolly Girl" and "the one I slept with in 2009."
@Tmoney68: This baby at McDonalds may have started the screaming competition, but I guarantee I'm going to win it.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: [Brings a snowball to a work meeting and tosses it at boss] I'm not trying to disprove the theory of global warming I just don't like you.