@Ilovelamp1979: One of the worst things about tweeting while driving is all of the people that seem to appear out of nowhere on the sidewalk.
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@tourettzgoth: Keep an identical glass of vodka next to the water on your bedside table for a refreshing morning game of Russian Roulette
@gwatts77: Me: Can I order the conch fritters please? Waitress: The "ch" is pronounced like a "k" Me: Okay Bick.
@Reverend_Scott: Guys; if she stops responding to your messages for days, 100% of the time it's a technical problem. Keep trying.