@shkeeber: One time I intentionally asked a thin woman "when she was due" because I was bored. So yeah, I guess you could say I'm into extreme sports.
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@pinupteacher: [me on phone with mechanic] Car won't start. I think it's the battery. Or power steering. Could be a fuse. Wheels, probably wheels. Engine.
@Book_Krazy: I really hate it when I have to go to work because my abundant wealth doesn't exist.
@batkaren: I lovingly caress my belly. "You're expecting?" a woman asks. I smile serenely. "Just ate an amazing burrito," I tell her.