@BisHilarious: One time I stayed in a relationship three months longer than I should've because the person had a flattering mirror in their apartment
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@xysist: Women are so jealous. I bet Eve counted Adam's ribs everyday to see if another woman had been created.
@AnOrangeSNES: ME: Sometimes I feel like I'm in a bad tweet NARRATOR: And he was ME: I see you NARRATOR: He could see me ME: Stop NARRATOR: I did not stop
@TheDailyManning: Dear girls, Santa saw your Facebook page, you're getting clothes and a dictionary for Christmas.