@MrRamBillings: One time I was so high, my flatscreen fell off the wall and I thought it was just part of the movie.
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@dshack8: You don't know shit about pressure until you're the only Black person on the dance floor while white people clap & form a circle around you.
@hythemafia: I've quit my new job as a postman..... .....they handed me my first letter to deliver, I looked at it and thought: "This isn't for me."
@withanewname: "Welcome to D.A.D.D.D.S. Dads Against Dads Doing Dumb Shit. Repeat after me." [whole room] "AFTER ME" "Ok fellas, lets start here"