@weinerdog4life: one time my cousin greg put on two jean jackets and he exploded, there was mustache everywhere
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@BGH70: The company hates when I helicopter into work. It's always, "zip up your pants and go see HR now!"
@SCbchbum: "Don't kill it!" my friend pleaded for a spider's life inside. So I carefully trapped it in a cup, brought it outside, then stomped on it.
@Cali_Kid_Mike: If you want a waitress to leave you alone for a half hour, tell her you need 5 more minutes to order.
@RatBatallion: My favorite part of the bible is when god gives people free will and then kills everyone with a flood for not acting the way he wanted .