@clowndaddie: One time my friend Brandon’s Dad and his mom were in a heated argument in the car and she took his kid rock cd out of the player and threw it out the window with rage and he looked her dead in the eyes and pulled out a second copy of that same cd and put it back in the player
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@bidenandobama: Biden: why can't I log into my twitter what's everyone talking about today Obama:
@schumoo: Just tell me how many calories are in the entire package and save me the trouble of doing all the multiplication.
@omgthatspunny: Cinderella was thrown off the basketball team because she ran away from the ball.
@RobDenBleyker: I hope when the Avengers meet Spider-Man they give him shit for not helping when NYC got attacked.