@baeblacksheep: ONLY text me in an emergency. Like my car's shooting flames from the trunk, one of my exes dies eventfully, or if someone thinks I'm sexy.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@SmartassChef: Nothing freaks me out like when I'm ordering from a Chinese restaurant and I ask "What kind of meat is that?" and they answer "yes"
@inmynewskin: Teacher: you can be anything you want Me: Beyonce Her: well, not that (we stare at each other blankly for 17 min...) Me: Hi I'm Beyonce
@Sean_Burgundy_: I always try to hold in my sneezes so I don't give someone a reason to talk to me
@Scorpio1080: Black Friday: Because Only in America, People trample others for Sales the day after being thankful for what they already have