@LelooAssassin: only thing keeping me from being stripper is about 60 pounds
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@weinerdog4life: I hate when people talk to me while I'm using the restroom, the other day, this guy was all like "Sir this is a display model at Home Depot"
@miss_foofoo: I never understood why people get buried in suits. When I die bury me in my PJ's. If I'm gonna be sleeping that long I wanna be comfortable.
@julie2288: 90% of parenting is giving up the last fried cheese stick to your kid and pretending you're OK with it.