@ch000ch: OPEN UP. THIS IS THE POLICE. THANK YOU. CAN WE USE YOUR BATHROOM
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@dafloydsta: Genie: Sure about this? Me: C'mon do it Genie: It's your last wis- Me: I WANNA BE RICH Genie: Alakazam! Hi Rich, I'm Genie
@1InTheStinker: The cops came to my house claiming my dog chased someone down on a bike! I explained to the idiots that my dog doesn't own a bike.