@CatsForDinnerz: Opened a can of expired beans and an eagle flew out carrying a photo of a can of fresh beans. I nervously ate the photo while he observed.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@chrisrockoz: You only live once, so don't forget to spend 15 hours every day on the internet, desperately searching for the validation of strangers.
@stevefrigley: Just recorded my boss yelling at someone on the phone. Guess who has a new ringtone.