@Roxtalled: Opening a Twitter account is like opening a bag of money after you rob a bank. You're happy until shit explodes in your face.
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@InternetHippo: It’s inspiring today to see so many voters researching and learning about an important issue they voted on yesterday
@codyspencer0: The guy who invented folding chairs lovingly cares for his product which is a problem for his wife who has season tickets to pro wrestling
@shegotagronk: I'm reenacting the War of 1812 with 47 gummy bears so I think the Ambien has finally kicked in. Casualties have been immense... & delicious