@NicestHippo: Oscar nominations are out. Let's experience actual emotion about multimillionaires giving each other gold
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@TuffyNyC: My ear is bleeding because I tried to shave it. Now I have to create some elaborate lie to tell ppl how I cut my ear.
@Sarcasticsapien: Coworker: You're so condescending and arrogant. Me: They mean the same thing so you didn't need to say both.
@SigneSaysSo: My pants are so tight I'm legitimately afraid they won't fit if I miss a day of shaving my legs.