@mommajessiec: Other Mom: We just got back from a trip to the Caribbean, so we are trying to get our life back to normal. You know how it is.
Me: Totally. We just got back from a trip to the grocery store.
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@jakefromstfarm3: When I was a kid I made all of my toys watch Toy Story so that they knew I was on to them.
@Amburglar_: Facebook friend: If you can't handle me at my worst, then you- SHUT UP, SHANNON. YOU'RE *ALWAYS* AT YOUR WORST.
@TashyP_: I'm not going to make my daughter choose a religion, I'll explain the differences & when the time comes she can choose either Marvel or DC.
@batkaren: [Cretaceous Period] T-REX: *eating pterodactyl, sad* I just wish it were meatier... DRUNK GUARDIAN ANGEL: A meteor? Tha's weird but ok 1 sec
@nikkithecanuck: Fitbits are just like Tamagotchis except the stupid little creature you have to keep alive is yourself.
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