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@ReginaldDennys: Ouija board......"your going to die!"
@maughammom: My 'Mom Voice' was so loud even the neighbors washed their hands and cleaned their rooms.
@eyeswidebutt: [dinner table]
gfs dad: so what do you do for a living
me: human trafficking
gf: he's a crossing guard dad
@MurphyMcLachlan: Doc I keep throwing up
Did u eat anything odd lately
What about that bottle youre holding labelled "lizard juice"
You said eat, idiot