@Lexactly: [Ouija board]
Spirits are you there?
U R C U T E D O Y O U H A V E K I K
@ThaJawn: Me: *empties 4's maracas
4: *shakes maracas* They're broken
Me: Oh no.. What happend?
@AdamOfEarth: 12013 B.C.: You might run into cougars while out clubbing
2013 A.D.: You might run into cougars while out clubbing
@Mikecanrant: Pretty upset to find out that salmonella poisoning has nothing to do with a vindictive fish named Ella.
@preritpathak: People on Facebook Nowadays:
*Clicks pic while sipping coffee*
*Posts as DP with irrelevant caption: Every scar makes me who I am*
@TheMichaelRock: Boss: Anyone have anything else to add to this meeting?
Me: Yes. I am awesome.
Me: Write that shit down.