@TheMichaelRock: Our laundry room flooded because an apple chunk clogged the washer hose. Go ahead, have kids. They have pocket apples.
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@notxzibit: Google search history: Marawana Marjawana Is there a j in marawana Wheat Wheat for smoking Free wheet
@Kyle_Lippert: The inventor of Chapstick died today. Unfortunately his body was lost while being transferred to the morgue.
@HallpassCanada: Everyone always wants to date the hot crazy chick.....Till you're standing outside watching your house burn.
@onedumbshark: My bologna has a first name, and a second name, and a fake name, and a sexy nickname, and exactly none of them are your business so go away.