@headway10: Overheard in a restaurant. Grandma: "Oh, I could really go for a Quickie right about now!" Grandpa: "It's pronounced a Quiche, dear!"
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@TheRolo: Juliet: you know it's true love, when you finish each other's- Romeo: LIFE Juliet: [sighs all annoyed] like why do you say shit like that?
@RadOrDie: I wouldn't mind getting arrested today because I'm having a great hair day and my mug shot would be fabulous.
@cornlog: My son is screaming his head off in his room but there's no way I'm going in there if his monster reports are true.