@TheMichaelRock: Pac-Man taught me that you can eat ghosts if you take enough pills.
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@Abby__Rose: I dated a guy who always kneeled and prayed before sex. I still don't know if he was scared of what I'd do or thankful. Either way, amen.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: A coworker just asked me how I stay so thin so I responded "I don't post pictures of my food online" and I think she believed me.
@SardonicTart: I waited for so long at the doctor's office that by the time they called me it was time for my follow-up appointment.