@GrandadJFreeman: *painting your nails* one hand : perfect. other hand : looks like a blind cat did it.
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@TheAlexP: A rabbit has a father who has a big hair care product empire and wonders if one day his child will become the Hair heir hare.
@AsgardianRose: Please stop putting flyers on my windshield in parking lots. I have no desire to see your new band called "Parking Violation".
@jessokfine: People always throwing cursed objects into the sea hello, no that is how you get haunted sharks
@CornOnTheGoblin: [fake yawns to put my arm around date but it's so i can pet her dog who is also on the couch]