@HonestToddler: Parents: It's unfair to put your toddler on a leash if you're not going to also let them pee next to parked cars.
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@John_M15: The "Slow Children Playing" signs always make me sad. Would it cost that much more to thrown in punctuation?
@: ME WATCHING OLYMPIC EVENT: “Holy shit that was amazing!” COMMENTATOR: “Ooh, that was not good at all. He must really be upset with himself.”
@OneFunnyMummy: Before kids: I'd choose going blind over going deaf. After kids: Deaf! I wanna be deaf!