@GrantTanaka: parents, please remember to teach your children not to talk to strangers, you know how boring your children are
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@Dawn_M_: When people are kissing in public, it's weird how angry they get when you try and join in.
@bobvulfov: FBI AGENT: [lifting crime scene tape and walking in] dale howard, fbi ME: [following him] bob vulfov, looking for a bathroom
@AimeeHelene1: Warning to friends: If you piss me off I'll put a for sale sign in my yard and list your phone number to call for inquiries.