@ruinedpicnic: parents, think twice before dressing your child as Cecil the Lion this year. my son will be dressed as a dentist, and I gave him a real gun
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@bazecraze: The whole purpose of travel is to return home and discover what your house actually smells like.
@AdamBroud: *Sees ant carrying a leaf that weighs 3x its body weight* Wife: Can you imagine being that strong? Me: *Picking up leaf* Yes.
@ddsmidt: When you call home on a holiday and get passed around, it's worse than being included on a group text.