@FunnyJokeBook: Parents: "Why don't you come socialize with the family?" Me: *sits with family* *gets insulted by entire family* *goes back to bedroom*
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@McKnightyBoo: It's great how you have legs that can take you away from a conversation when you don't feel like listening to people anymore
@Lisa_Bizzle: Dating a guy with big hands is the best, at any time I can say "Babe, can you hold these 72 doll heads?" And he can, he can hold them all.
@MUMSIEesq: Anytime I pass an unlocked minivan I throw a few of my kids' most annoying toys in the trunk.