@qwertying: Paris Hilton says that bees frighten her. I bet the rest of the alphabet does too.
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@QwertyJones3: Uh, guys... I just heard from my doctor, and it's bad news. If you've retweeted me recently, you should really go get yourself checked out.
@cameronrbrown: Just one more week until I can finally eat candy out of my socks again.... without looking weird.
@lemonmartinis: Whenever I select next-day delivery for an online purchase, I imagine someone, somewhere, yells CRAP really loud then people scurry like mad