@frenchielaboozi: i can't believe i have to keep washing this stupid body until i die
@fluffysuse: My ex just asked if I want to go on holiday with him and my ex mother-in-law and now I don't need Twitter because I will never stop laughing
@therealeatwood: “…and silk so fine, Sire, that fools cannot even see it.”
EMPEROR: So idiots can see through my clothes? That sounds completely acceptable.
@_Kim_Jongun: Someone in South Korea accused North Korea of having assassination squads.
That's a lie.
On an unrelated note, I need that guy's address.
@shutupmikeginn: Don't tell me I look tired unless you're offering to carry me
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