@katiefzack: People are always weirded out when I take notes during episodes of Dexter.
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@SteveKoehler22: Why do countries "cut ties" when things get tense ? So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.
@wittwitbarista: With the magic of makeup, I go from tired old hag to tired looking old hag with eyeliner.
@qwajo_jnr: You know that moment when you close a cupboard and hear something fall? That's the sound of someone else's problem
@Sam_From_Kansas: This waitress at Olive Garden has been grating cheese onto my plate for 13 hours now.