@KevinFarzad: People are like snowflakes: I can't talk to them.
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@Jade_VK: "This soup was so good I wish I could just...NOMCRNCHNCH" *chewing glass* "There must be a better way!" -Inventing the bread bowl
@TheWoodenslurpy: If a woman asks if she looks fat, it’s not enough to say “no.” You must also act very surprised by the question. Jump backwards if necessary
@colsonwhitehead: Saw lady reading my book & was gonna say hi but I'm wearing the same shirt as in author photo & didn't want her to think I only had 1 shirt.