@FilthyRichmond: People are so nosy, always asking me what I just injected into their neck. Don't worry about it!
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@Midgetspar: My boss was all, "Do you know why I called you to the office, " and I was like, "I dunno is there a hidden security camera in the bathroom."
@hurlarious: Why doesn't every mistake in real life I make have a squiggly red line underneath it?
@SirEviscerate: Are you eating Jell-O? Cow: "Yeah." You know what gelatin is made from, right? Cow: "No, what?" Uh. Rainbows. Enjoy, buddy.