@tastefactory: People Magazine sounds like something aliens pretending to be humans would call their magazine.
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@KatMcSnatch: My ex sent me a text saying "please delete my number..." I sent one back saying "who's this?"
@FrenulumBreve: Me:[grabbing my guitar] i wrote this for you. Her: awww. Me:*pulls note out of guitar hole* "we're out of cereal."