@cloudypianos: people say Einstein dropped out of school and still was a genius but he didn't drop out to drink fireball and start a band this is important
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@panmidwest: [chick-fil-a] EMPLOYEE: can i take your order? ME: yes, thank you for asking EMPLOYEE: my pleasure ME: and thank you for saying it was your pleasure EMPLOYEE: please don’t do this ME: oh i’m just getting started
@ShittyComedian: My drug of choice is laughter....and cocaine. Mostly cocaine. Sometimes angel dust. Molly is cool too. RT if you love Jesus.
@MatCro: COP: Describe the robber to our sketch artist ME: He had one eye higher than the other and his lips on his forehead PICASSO: I got this