@LostFelicia: People that use abbreviations like ppl, wyd, hmu, and idk - what do you do with all that time you saved?
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@Jim_Capie: Bruce Wayne: I wanna fight crime. Alfred: You're a billionaire. Open orphanages, free clinics, day care cen- Bruce: No I wanna punch people.
@rachelle_mandik: there is no way you can prove that babies grow and are not instead replaced overnight with entirely new but slightly larger babies
@Lovestained555: My 5yr old eats chicken wings with the precision of a hitman cleaning his rifle.
@jjhartinger: Casting agent: If we hire you at SNL what would you like to accomplish? Me: Staying up past 10:00.