@RuthePhoenix: People who call themselves "grammar Nazis" deserve the worst possible sentence.
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@AsYouNotWish: Wife: How many women have u slept with? Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake.
@Cheeseboy22: One of the World's Strongest Man events should be "Pulling apart two shopping carts that are stuck together."
@ipalatsky: - You got so drunk last night, you were dancing on the table in your underwear!! - Me? In my underwear? You must have left early.