@mc_funbags: People who go jogging, you realise we have cars now, right?
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@DiGiornoPizza: Imagine a world without pizza. No, no, stop crying this was just pretend I'M SORRY TRY AND CONTROL YOURSELF I'M SORRY
@badbanana: Stick around after sticking around after the Thor 2 credits. Very realistic 3D of a theater manager telling you to leave.
@SweetTweetsBRO: I love when I'm walking closely behind a girl and she starts to speed walk away. It's like she knew I wanted to race all along.