@SeanEmeny: People who have wheels on their office chair, how do you get any work done?
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@DaddyJew: 7: what do you want for your birthday? Me: idk a new car 7: ok *walks away* [ 2 min later ] 7: what do you want that's under $6.42?
@TheTweetOfGod: Instagram is experiencing difficulties. Until further notice, please cease visually chronicling the tedious mundanities of your life.
@murrman5: "so, have you ever done a job interview over the phone before?" [over vigorous peeing] no, this will be a first