@PJTLynch: People who say watching golf on TV is boring have obviously never listened to golf on the radio
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@Tmoney68: If I survived a plane crash in the wilderness, my biggest concern would be how much my airport parking bill would be.
@johngaysee: My dog and I have two things in common: We like burying our bones in other peoples backyards and fleas :-(
@bobvulfov: ME: why is my son failing TEACHER: just because u gave him that name doesnt mean he'll be intelligent ME: [gasping] cover ur ears Smartboy
@badbanana: That guy who ran through the White House could go to prison for ten years, so there's another reason I don't run.