@CarrieMayhem: People who say "you can run but you can't hide" have never played hide & seek with me.. or seen me run.
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@dorkwing_duck: The scene where Indiana Jones swaps the bags and runs from a boulder but it's me trying to eat a cookie without my kid seeing me
@TheWoodenslurpy: If I commit suicide, it’ll be for a shallow reason, like unrequited texts. But the note I leave will mention world hunger at least 11 times.