@beefman138: People who scream on roller-coasters : Did you not expect it to go fast down the hill?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@SatansTongue: Where is your 1,000 word essay? "Right here" *pulls out selfie* That's a picture... "A picture is worth 1,000 words" *becomes valedictorian*
@WilliamAder: My Twitter clique is basically five or six people who have mistaken me for someone else.
@HollyMemphis: Praying mantis walks up to his buddies with no head, "Guess who got laid last night?"