@bananagrvyrd: People who talk to themselves are more intelligent then those who don't, or at least that's what I like to tell myself.
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@seancoleran: Girlfriend: Why is this broom broken? Did you draw a lightning bolt on the cat? Are you writing with a feather? Me: Muggles....
@WittySassBasket: I like to finish my pelvic exam by asking the doctor 'hey, where'd your watch go?'
@TheCatWhisprer: I'd rather get killed by the Blair Witch on the first night than have to camp another night.