@confusedlush: People who try to prepare for the end of the world are obviously misunderstanding the core concept.
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@david8hughes: [throws a dart at map of the world] One day, I'm gonna go over there & pull that dart out. The next time I wanna play darts, probably.
@Adar79Angie: When the girl working the counter says "would you like fries with that?" say.."are you calling me fat??" then burst into tears. Free meal.
@Disalmanac: Today in 1892, JRR Tolkien was born. He wrote about all the horrible things that will happen if you put a ring on it.