@GabbbarSingh: People with Swiss bank accounts are often confused between their Bank balance and the Back Account number.
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@wolfpupy: if i was the one who drove the titanic i bet i could have hit at least 3 ice bergs before it sank
@k_lli: My favorite part of the holiday party is getting to meet my coworkers' dates & find out who chooses to put up with these people for free.
@CrazyIdiot6: Friends- What did you get for your birthday? Her- He went to Jared Friends- You're engaged!!! Her- No Jared is our weed dealer
@trojansauce: ALFRED: *wringing out wet birthday party invitation* it's difficult to read, but i'd hazard a guess at aquaman, master wayne